Why isn't there a proper friend request system?

[Steven.7623]

I've always wondered why GW2 had such a weird friend system. You aren't notified if a person has added you until you manually check the followers list yourself and you never know if you've properly added someone since it automatically displays the person you add even if they haven't added you back. Why is the friend system like this? There should be a proper friend request system that notifies you if you want to accept or decline a friend request. And your friends list should only display people who've accepted your friend request. Your friends list should also automatically remove people who've removed you friend their friends list.

[casualkenny.9817]

Well it is weird, but it probably isn't a big deal? There's no buddy chat channel, and it effectively counts as both a friend's list as well as a follow list. You can also enter descriptors in to help you remember who's who. Its probably more accurate to call it a tracking list (both friends and useful contacts) than a friends list.

 

If you add someone, but he doesn't add you back (and doesn't respond when you contact him), then he doesn't want to pursue the frenship. If you mutually get on well, you will add each other, and continue contacting each other anyway

 

(would be a different case if there was buddy chat channels like in other games)

 

A plus point is, strangers can't ping you with bogus requests repeatedly to annoy you, as can be done in some other games

[Calisanna.8732]

I wish they had a proper block system also. If I block someone, it should automatically remove me from their friend list, and my follower list. I clearly blocked them because I don’t want anything to do with them. I’ve blocked ppl who end up still being able to follow me, and see what maps I’m on. This makes me uneasy. I now play offline half the time and unable to whisper friends or talk in guild all because I have to hide from people I want nothing to do with. It’s some serious bs.

[Linken.6345]

> @"Calisanna.8732" said:

> I wish they had a proper block system also. If I block someone, it should automatically remove me from their friend list, and my follower list. I clearly blocked them because I don’t want anything to do with them. I’ve blocked ppl who end up still being able to follow me, and see what maps I’m on. This makes me uneasy. I now play offline half the time and unable to whisper friends or talk in guild all because I have to hide from people I want nothing to do with. It’s some serious bs.

 

What can a blocked person really do to you if they happend on you in the same map?

[casualkenny.9817]

Do peeps really stalk in-game? That's sad...

[Khalisto.5780]

> @"Calisanna.8732" said:

> I wish they had a proper block system also. If I block someone, it should automatically remove me from their friend list, and my follower list. I clearly blocked them because I don’t want anything to do with them. I’ve blocked ppl who end up still being able to follow me, and see what maps I’m on. This makes me uneasy. I now play offline half the time and unable to whisper friends or talk in guild all because I have to hide from people I want nothing to do with. It’s some serious bs.

 

hhmm, almost sure if you block someone they dont get notifications when you log in, and your stats for them in their friend/block liat is aways offline

 

I know that cuz I play a lot of pvp and learned not to say anything so ppl wouldn't block me and then I can track them to avoid play with them again

[kharmin.7683]

> @"casualkenny.9817" said:

> Do peeps really stalk in-game? That's sad...

 

Yes, they do. There have been complaints about this in the past. The usual response is to report them.

[Pockethole.5031]

> @"Calisanna.8732" said:

> I wish they had a proper block system also. If I block someone, it should automatically remove me from their friend list, and my follower list. I clearly blocked them because I don’t want anything to do with them. I’ve blocked ppl who end up still being able to follow me, and see what maps I’m on. This makes me uneasy. I now play offline half the time and unable to whisper friends or talk in guild all because I have to hide from people I want nothing to do with. It’s some serious bs.

 

If you can't accept that those people exist, that's kind of a 'you' problem. If it bothers you that much, change servers.

My solution is to talk, and when I feel like I've tried enough, I give up and only then block them. Usually talking is the solution. I will never understand those who think blocking is a solution. It's a last resort to me.

[EmmetOtter.8542]

> @"Linken.6345" said:

> What can a blocked person really do to you if they happend on you in the same map?

Humanity is endlessly inventive and creative when it comes to cruelty.

They could,

* Encourage their friends to antagonize and insult you.

* Whisper you from an alt account.

* Encourage friends and others to false report you.

* And the blocked player isn't invisible to you. Knowing that someone following you around at the very least is creepy, and you can bet the other guy knows that.

 

> @"Pockethole.5031" said:

> If you can't accept that those people exist, that's kind of a 'you' problem. If it bothers you that much, change servers.

> My solution is to talk, and when I feel like I've tried enough, I give up and only then block them. Usually talking is the solution. I will never understand those who think blocking is a solution. It's a last resort to me.

Terrible advice. Talking or interacting with them can only make the situation worse by letting them know their tactics are working and puts you at risk for getting reported by the harasser. Also, being the victim of cyber stalking and bullying is not a 'you' problem. You are never responsible for the hostile actions that others take. Suggesting that is victim blaming.

 

People should just follow the procedures Anet makes available.

https://help.guildwars2.com/hc/en-us/articles/360010187753-Reporting-a-Player-or-Guild

[Calisanna.8732]

> @"Khalisto.5780" said:

> > @"Calisanna.8732" said:

> > I wish they had a proper block system also. If I block someone, it should automatically remove me from their friend list, and my follower list. I clearly blocked them because I don’t want anything to do with them. I’ve blocked ppl who end up still being able to follow me, and see what maps I’m on. This makes me uneasy. I now play offline half the time and unable to whisper friends or talk in guild all because I have to hide from people I want nothing to do with. It’s some serious bs.

>

> hhmm, almost sure if you block someone they dont get notifications when you log in, and your stats for them in their friend/block liat is aways offline

>

> I know that cuz I play a lot of pvp and learned not to say anything so ppl wouldn't block me and then I can track them to avoid play with them again

 

They do. We did a test. > @"Pockethole.5031" said:

> > @"Calisanna.8732" said:

> > I wish they had a proper block system also. If I block someone, it should automatically remove me from their friend list, and my follower list. I clearly blocked them because I don’t want anything to do with them. I’ve blocked ppl who end up still being able to follow me, and see what maps I’m on. This makes me uneasy. I now play offline half the time and unable to whisper friends or talk in guild all because I have to hide from people I want nothing to do with. It’s some serious bs.

>

> If you can't accept that those people exist, that's kind of a 'you' problem. If it bothers you that much, change servers.

> My solution is to talk, and when I feel like I've tried enough, I give up and only then block them. Usually talking is the solution. I will never understand those who think blocking is a solution. It's a last resort to me.

 

If you had negative interactions with these people in real life, or have dealt with someone who has NPD before you might change your mind about this statement. Ppl with NPD find more people around you to harass you as well. I want to be able to enjoy my gameplay without worry that some random FLYING MONKEY is going to write me and ruin my morning on orders from a NPD person.

[Calisanna.8732]

> @"Linken.6345" said:

> > @"Calisanna.8732" said:

> > I wish they had a proper block system also. If I block someone, it should automatically remove me from their friend list, and my follower list. I clearly blocked them because I don’t want anything to do with them. I’ve blocked ppl who end up still being able to follow me, and see what maps I’m on. This makes me uneasy. I now play offline half the time and unable to whisper friends or talk in guild all because I have to hide from people I want nothing to do with. It’s some serious bs.

>

> What can a blocked person really do to you if they happend on you in the same map?

 

A lot actually. See above comment and if you don’t know what NPD is, look it up.

[Hashberry.4510]

The system was created in a friendlier time.

[Pockethole.5031]

> > @"Pockethole.5031" said:

> > If you can't accept that those people exist, that's kind of a 'you' problem. If it bothers you that much, change servers.

> > My solution is to talk, and when I feel like I've tried enough, I give up and only then block them. Usually talking is the solution. I will never understand those who think blocking is a solution. It's a last resort to me.

> Terrible advice. Talking or interacting with them can only make the situation worse by letting them know their tactics are working and puts you at risk for getting reported by the harasser. Also, being the victim of cyber stalking and bullying is not a 'you' problem. You are never responsible for the hostile actions that others take. Suggesting that is victim blaming.

 

I am not victim blaming. However, there are people who are extremely trigger happy to block/kick about anyone they might dislike even in the slightest, and that comes across to me as irresponsible, a person who thinks every problem is solved by blocking/ghosting another person without thinking how that other person might feel like. I think Calisanna.8732 is not such a person, and she/he likely is not.

Anyone who blocks another, is not a victim automatically. They could be a difficult person to deal with themselves.

I have had to block some people as well. After witnessing absolute disrespect towards me or my family. And I have been blocked too, because I had a crush on the wrong guy. He probably felt he messed with the wrong person. But he could have handled it way better in my opinion.

I suppose you now assume I am a crazy stalker lady. I will be blocked, and there will be no more to say. I understand both sides. Just saying, that it's not always as black and white as it may appear to be.

 

> If you had negative interactions with these people in real life, or have dealt with someone who has NPD before you might change your mind about this statement. Ppl with NPD find more people around you to harass you as well. I want to be able to enjoy my gameplay without worry that some random FLYING MONKEY is going to write me and ruin my morning on orders from a NPD person.

 

I see. Well in that case it's really bad. If you cannot get that person banned by contacting support, you're not left with many choices. I apologize, but I had to be cautious. I hope you will be rid of that scourge.

[Trise.2865]

> @"Pockethole.5031" said:

> I see. Well in that case it's really bad. If you cannot get that person banned by contacting support, you're not left with many choices. I apologize, but I had to be cautious. I hope you will be rid of that scourge.

 

No one person should *ever* have enough power to get someone else banned with a single report. There *must be* due process and investigation. Every. Time.

[Pockethole.5031]

> @"Trise.2865" said:

> > @"Pockethole.5031" said:

> > I see. Well in that case it's really bad. If you cannot get that person banned by contacting support, you're not left with many choices. I apologize, but I had to be cautious. I hope you will be rid of that scourge.

>

> No one person should *ever* have enough power to get someone else banned with a single report. There *must be* due process and investigation. Every. Time.

 

Of course.

[Ashantara.8731]

The whole Friends/Block system is in need of an overhaul, but I guess it isn't high on the priority list.

[Zaklex.6308]

> @"Ashantara.8731" said:

> The whole Friends/Block system is in need of an overhaul, but I guess it isn't high on the priority list.

 

Not only is it not high on the priority list, I highly doubt it's on the priority list at all. Further more, give it 6 - 9 - 12 months after you've blocked someone and you can most likely unblock them as they've forgotten who the hell you are by then, unless they've continually stalked you the entire time, by which you should have had enough ammunition to have reported them dozens of times(or those "friends" of theirs they also have bother you). Personally, I'm highly tolerant of assholes, because I can be one myself, but also because once I find a way under their skin, I'll exploit it to the maximum(and it's always non-reportable methods that work best) besides the fact they almost never use the report mechanism themselves(why would they want to get the person they're harassing banned or suspended, then they've just deprived themselves of their "fun").

[Danikat.8537]

I'd like friends requests to be mutual too, but for an entirely different reason. Recently a bunch of my work friends started playing GW2 and when I found out I told them to add me as a friend and gave them my username....then when I logged in that evening I realised I've got about 20 people on my followers list and no idea who most of them are. I don't normally pay much attention to it so I wasn't sure which were new names and which had been there for ages.

 

I was left with the options of waiting for each person on my followers list to log in and then whispering them to try to work out if they're one of my friends, or going back to the group chat and asking them all to tell me their usernames too so I could add them.

 

We got there eventually but it was a lot more hassle than if I'd just been able to share my username and wait for friend requests to come in like in other games.

[Linken.6345]

> @"Danikat.8537" said:

> I'd like friends requests to be mutual too, but for an entirely different reason. Recently a bunch of my work friends started playing GW2 and when I found out I told them to add me as a friend and gave them my username....then when I logged in that evening I realised I've got about 20 people on my followers list and no idea who most of them are. I don't normally pay much attention to it so I wasn't sure which were new names and which had been there for ages.

>

> I was left with the options of waiting for each person on my followers list to log in and then whispering them to try to work out if they're one of my friends, or going back to the group chat and asking them all to tell me their usernames too so I could add them.

>

> We got there eventually but it was a lot more hassle than if I'd just been able to share my username and wait for friend requests to come in like in other games.

 

Well if they just started a good indicaton can be their ap.

[Stand The Wall.6987]

that's a good question.

 

> @"Ashantara.8731" said:

> The whole Friends/Block system is in need of an overhaul, but I guess it isn't high on the priority list.

 

everything is on the table.

[zealex.9410]

Bacause anet is fine letting ppl get chased off the game by stalkers.

 

On a lighter note, they prob thought being denied a friend request would be too much for some ppl so instead they gave us twitter's follower system but worse.

[YtseJam.9784]

> @"kharmin.7683" said:

> > @"casualkenny.9817" said:

> > Do peeps really stalk in-game? That's sad...

>

> Yes, they do. There have been complaints about this in the past. The usual response is to report them.

 

I had happen to me in the past, reported them, and they said there's absolutely nothing they can do to prevent someone from stalking you. I've mentioned this before, even if you block people and they follow you, they can still see where you are on their friend list. they can send you party and squad invites to troll. But ANET's response to me was "there's nothing we can do with our current system to change that" and it was over a year ago.

[Etria.3642]

But people aren't always mutual friends.

 

For instance: I follow a couple world boss commanders. They have zero clue who I am and probably don't care. I care, because they are excellent at what they do, so if I am in the mood for world bosses, I check my friends list. THEN LFG.

 

Same for wvw. I have the pins I enjoy friended. I highly doubt they know me.

[Hashberry.4510]

> @"Etria.3642" said:

> But people aren't always mutual friends.

>

> For instance: I follow a couple world boss commanders. They have zero clue who I am and probably don't care. I care, because they are excellent at what they do, so if I am in the mood for world bosses, I check my friends list. THEN LFG.

>

> Same for wvw. I have the pins I enjoy friended. I highly doubt they know me.

 

I think this is the kind of thing they had in mind when the system was made. People were not so obsessive about strangers then.

[Obfuscate.6430]

> @"Etria.3642" said:

> But people aren't always mutual friends.

>

> For instance: I follow a couple world boss commanders. They have zero clue who I am and probably don't care. I care, because they are excellent at what they do, so if I am in the mood for world bosses, I check my friends list. THEN LFG.

>

> Same for wvw. I have the pins I enjoy friended. I highly doubt they know me.

 

I don't think changing the friend request system would change your ability to do this at all.

 

I 100% support the friend /block system being overhauled in favor of player safety.